What should you do when you fail??


I just came across a blog that struck a chord in me. For most of my life I have had a constant need for change. And of course this need has interfered with my abilitiy to maintain steady jobs, as well as interest in projects and people.

I lived for years wondering what was wrong with me and why I couldn’t be like everyone else. I was even medicated for it, which caused a myriad of other problems.

I was incredibly smart, talented, and could do virtually everything anyone ever showed me. I could solve complex problems with ease, and won numerous awards in school, although I rarely went and dropped out several times.

It was really frustrating because I wanted to do everything and I wanted to do it all NOW. I used to get so jealous of people who knew what they wanted to do and could stay with one thing. I recognized that I was ADHD many years ago, but other than labelling myself, I didn’t look into it much further.

Being older and wiser now, I’ve discovered some things that have made a world of difference in my life and in the lives of those around me. I want to share these things with you:

1. Life is far more enjoyable when you accept yourself as who you are and stop living to ‘fit in’ or meet the needs/wishes of other people.

2. I can finish things (and now do, even with distractions); AND it is also okay to give up or let go of things, projects, or people who are not serving your best interests (Always be kind, honest, sincere, and NEVER burn bridges)

3. Many projects will still be there later incase they reinterest me at another time.

4. There are jobs that are perfect for people with my skills/traits Like Project Management or Running a Business, etc.

5. ADHD is a gift. So is autism. So are many other ‘disorders’ that are sometimes negatively viewed. The trick is learning how to use these gifts and having supportive people around.

I got a book that’s call ADHD friendly ways to Organize Your Life, and since then (although I never finished it; which is okay), I have been able to get many things done that I wouldn’t have before. I now totally accept that I get extremely easily distracted, and communicate my needs better than ever before.

I still have difficulty with routine tasks (like housework, making meals, and choosing outfits), but am comfortable enough to ask for assistance now when needed.

It’s funny. I didn’t intend this to be an ADHD blog, but oh well; I’ll go with it.
I was just chuckling to myself because, although it’s frustrating at times, it takes me hours to get myself and my children dressed, fed and ready for the day; but if you gave me a complex problem or stuck me in the middle of a crises, I’d be able to put together , a practical solution extremely quickly and communicate it to involved parties, even if it incorporated numerous resources, variables, and obstacles.

Things that would take many people days, I can do in minutes or hours; but seemingly simple tasks are tedious and difficult for me. It makes me wish I never had to get dressed, cook or clean and that I could spend all of my time solving problems and delegating tasks. Either way, it is what it is. And this article is supposed to be about what you should do when you fail.

So, since I’ve failed more times than most people I’ve ever met, I believe I’ve now become an expert on the topic. In a nutshell; accept the failure and make a choice. Either move on, put it on the back burner, or try again.

Make sure you communicate with others about your failure and how you intend to deal with it. As long as you accept what is, and make a conscious choice; you won’t feel bad about it and can move on easily. And since you’ve communicated it with others, you won’t carry around the feeling of being a failure ‘in other people’s eyes’. You’ve brought it to the open and they can’t say anything about it. In fact, even if they do, they most likely admire your courage and honesty.

The reality is: Everyone fails. It’s usually the people who don’t admit it that feel the most pain from it. So, accept what is, make a choice, and enjoy failing forward. : )

Princess PW

PS–I wrote about failing today because I failed in my ‘No spending money for a year game’, and in continually blogging for 365 consecutive days. I have continued my quest, but without wordpress alongside me. Talk soon. Take care!

Day 68 to Day 72~Backseat Blogging

Well, as some of you may have noticed, I haven’t been as faithful to my blog as I’ve been in the past.  After much thought and consideration, I’ve decided to write less often; although I’m still continuing my 365 day quest on saving and making money AND my ‘No Spending Money for a Year’ Game.  I will just have to write sporadically.

Blogging is taking a back seat.  A back seat to ACTION.  There are times in life when priorities have to be shifted.  Times when a situation gives you only 2 options: Panic and wait for the consequences OR Take complete and focused action.

Right now, I am taking complete and focused action.

I owe more money this month than I have in a long time.  But, it’s not an impossible amount.  And if it was, I’d probably still find a way to make it work.

For anyone new to my blog, let me fill you in.  I just moved into a beautiful, but expensive house.  It has a lot of rental and business potential; otherwise I never would have done it.  I borrowed a little money for last month’s rent because this place came up quickly and I wasn’t ready for it.

Although I wasn’t ready, I had the income to support the costs.  The problem came when my tenants moved out at the same time I lost half of my child support.  And the house had been badly abused (student rental) before I moved in, so there was a lot to do to make it attractive to new tenants; especially in the off season.

So, the house is almost fully painted and furnished.  It’s finally looking great.  We’ve been here for over a month now.  Just today I got pictures posted on a few sites online for the rooms.  I’ve also calculated a way to afford to have someone clean the parts of the house that are difficult for me (and had 2 responses within the past half hour).  I only posted these ads a half an hour ago.  That’s a good sign.  : )

I have been offered a paying job.  I don’t have child care yet, and don’t know how or when I will find it.  But, if I can get trustworthy, safe, and reliable child care, I will be working on a project (that ties into the project I’m currently doing) AND I will be getting paid for my work.  That’s a change.

Although I’m terrific with money, I always want to help people and more often than not, do things for free.  I enjoy being generous.  I don’t enjoy being taken advantage of.  I’ve recently begun to speak up and stop giving when I believe I am being taken for.

Going back to the Backseat Blogging aspect of this post:  I will continue to write for the entire year.  I have a journal/daybook/idea keeper that I record everything in.  So, even if I’m not blogging, I’m keeping track of my $ journey still.  I’ll fill you in from time to time and write money saving tips and articles.  : )

Thanks for your support!  I appreciate it.  Happily posting,

Princess Pennywise

Day 67~Kids Birthday Gifts We Made For Free

My nephew turned 9 this week.  He loves Lego.  Since I’m not spending any money on gifts for a year, I didn’t get him any.  ; )

Instead, I made him a lake with rocks, leaves, a swan, and grasses.  It’s really quite impressive.

The whole idea is to add another element into the lego cities that he builds.  He doesn’t have a lake.  Especially one with so many different things in it.  It’s made on cardboard.  The edges are only cardboard, and the lake is closer to the middle.

He can set up his lego buildings around the lake, and put in his lego boats in the tissue paper water.  He can move the swan around and add dinosaurs or whatever he can imagine.

I might have to test it out with the lego before I give it to him.  : )

I also have to make a gift for my niece who is turning 2.  So far, all I’ve got for her is a candy necklace that I made out of fruit loops on a string.

I’m cultivating some ideas, and I know whatever I come up with will be something she will like.  And hopefully it won’t be something that is too messy.  Mother’s tend to frown upon additional messes sometimes.  Well, at least I do.  lol

It was SO much fun today making crafts with my kids.  Each one of my kids made my nephew something.  I think we’ll make more gifts together on Friday.

Princess PW

Day 66~Delegating is Getting Easier

I finally came to peace with the fact that I need to ask for help in order to achieve success in the elementary school projects I’m working on.

I’ve spent so much time worried about my financial situation and doing everything I can to bring in an income.  I even started to feel panicked.  The key word here is ‘started’.  Once I was able to shift my energy and feel secure knowing everything will work out; I was able to see more ways to create wealth and complete tasks, all while putting forth less effort than before.

Although I’m still devoting a lot of time and effort to my projects, I feel like I’m spending less time on them, and like I have more energy to accomplish them.

One of the reasons for this is that I’ve started asking for help with the components of the work project that are either difficult for me, or take more time than I can contribute right now.  I also came clean with a few people about the reality of my financial situation and the fact that I do not get paid for the work I put in; unless I find funding.

From one day’s discussions with people, I was able to find help in the following areas relating to the project: writing funding proposals, having landscape plans drawn, additional volunteers, and funding source direction.

Wow!  That takes so much off of my plate!  It has made it easier already for me, just knowing I have help.  And the fact that I don’t have to pretend that I’m not a work-from-home mom.  It’s so strange that in our culture, we’re supposed to look like we don’t have children when we’re working.  Mothers can accomplish many things.  And kids are an extension of them.  Why hide it??  I’m rather proud of them, and me.

I’ve come to peace with this too.  And since all of this, I’ve been much more productive and less fearful with regards to the project.  Project success and payment for my contributions are looking closer every day!  It’s getting exciting!

What’s more exciting is the fact that I know that I/we can bring amazing environments, education, gardens, and eco-interactive play areas into these schoolyards.  The kids are going to be so happy.  And I’m glad to be a catalyst for this change.

Princess PW

Day 65~Grocery Day!!

Well, it took me about a month after moving in to finally make the big grocery trip.  And man, was it awesome!!  My boyfriend picked up a few items here and there.  And I picked up only necessities for the past month.  But now…

Now, we have a happily stocked fridge and freezer again.

Unfortunately the grocery store we went to didn’t carry the items I had coupons for.  So, I’ll have to make another trip to a different grocery store soon.

On the bright side, I did hit up some major sales.  I LOVE SALES!

Princess PW

Day 64~No More Tenants

My only remaining tenant moved out today.  I will miss him.

Alas, he’s off to bigger and better things.  That’s a nice way of saying that he moved because the transportation in this area stinks.  He’s gone back to his country to visit his family for a few weeks, and then he’ll be moving back to this area; but to a more convenient location.

Well; it was good while it lasted.

I do have another tenant moving in here in May.  I showed the room to one person the other day; and will show another on Tuesday.  Who knows?  I’m sure something will come about.  Things have a way of working out.

The two tenants who just left though, were the best tenants ever.  I hope the next ones are just as nice; or somehow the transportation here becomes better; and that they move back in.  That would be the best situation ever.

I’m tired, and off to bed.  I’ve got a lot going on tomorrow, so I’ve got to get sleep!!  Goodnight.

Princess PW

Day 63~Bless My Friends

It’s the little things people do for me that I am so thankful for.

A friend of mine lent me some money towards getting the house that we’re living in.  Another one came by today with curtains for the windows.  And another friend gave me a professional massage for free; just because he thought I seemed ‘stressed out’ last week.

I just wanted  to say a big THANK YOU to anyone and everyone who has contributed to my life!!  You know who you are and you’re amazing!

I practice the ‘Law of Reciprocity’ so if you need anything at all; I’m here for you too.  : )

Princess PW

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